Here you'll find a selection of blogs from Enhance Mentoring, ranging from helpful checklists to mentoring definitions and advice. If you have a suggestion for a blog, let me know!
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19/10/2019 0 Comments Role Mentoring On the 15th September 2016, I sent an email to someone at work, explaining what mentoring was. This was before I had really done much research into it, before I had been mentored myself, and during the 'selfish' time when I wanted to create the programme for my own benefit. As you can imagine, my idea of mentoring was slightly off... Have a read:
''Say I wanted to become a client manager. I may want to know what qualities or skills I need (that I can't find on any official job specs or alike), or what a day in a life of a client manager looks like. I may just want to know if I would be able to do it. So I would look at which client managers have agreed to be mentors, I would approach one of them, and we would have informal discussions/meetings to help me on my way. So if you agreed to the scheme, you could be my mentor. I would ask you any questions I may have about the role, you can give me advice, and it would be an ongoing relationship so if you spotted any behaviours that needed to be changed, or heard of any opportunities you think might help me, you can let me know''. As you can see, I had a rough idea of what mentoring was, but I was fixated on the smaller picture of learning about a role, rather than everything else mentoring could do. When we started the mentoring programme at work, we always wanted to focus on the bigger picture stuff, but during my research I discovered that were other mentoring types and methods. Turns out, what I had described in that email (without realising) was role mentoring. Role mentoring is more focused that traditional mentoring. It involves guidance and advice from the mentor and clear goals and expectations from the mentee, but it focuses on the mentor's current job role and the path they followed to get there. A role mentor can offer a mentee some real life, realistic guidance with regards to getting into a specific role and then making it a success. Role mentoring is appealing for mentees who perhaps haven't achieved what they have wanted to yet, and want to know what they could do to make things happen for them, in the way of learning opportunities, gaining certain experience, and further training. It's something that I believe mentees who are just starting out in their careers should seek out wherever possible because it can help give them some specific goals and help structure the years ahead. One of the notable benefits of role mentoring is that it doesn't require a huge time commitment from either party. Instead of organised weekly/monthly meetings over a long time period like traditional mentoring, role mentoring can occur within a shorter time frame. Part of the reason for this is that the goal for the mentee is quite clear and concise - learn how their mentor got to where they are now, and learn about the role they are currently in. It's similar to a coaching or training session in that respect, so it can be fairly easy to structure. Traditional mentoring on the other hand can be quite the journey and cannot be structured in the same way. Role mentoring might naturally occur within a traditional mentoring relationship, but only if you both steer it in that direction. During the programme we created at work, we advised our mentors and mentees to try and avoid focusing so much on the mentor's role because we didn't want them to miss out on the larger benefits of the programme. However, talking about how a mentor got to where they are, the challenges they faced on their journey, and the responsibilities they now have and how they tackle them, is completely normal. The key is to not focus on the details, like role mentoring would. A great way to distinguish between the two is this; Traditional mentoring: a mentor will talk to the mentee about their past job roles, what they learnt about themselves, positive and negative experiences from their past roles, how they influenced who they are now, and how the lessons they've learnt are applied in their current roles. Perhaps they lost a job 10 years ago because they didn't take it seriously and didn't recognise opportunities for further growth within it. Now they make sure this doesn't happen again by always taking ownership of their role and seeking out new ways to improve their skills. Role mentoring: a mentor will talk to the mentee about their past roles in detail. They will list their core responsibilities, and talk about the training they went through to improve their ability to handle said responsibilities. They will talk about their decisions when choosing/applying for new job roles and what skills they looked to gain and work on whilst in them. They will talk about their goals for the future and how they intend to achieve them, and they'll talk about their current role and what a typical day in their life looks like. The goal for the mentee in both scenarios is to absorb what the mentor says and apply what is relevant in their own lives. One is just more specific and focused than the other. The content is different but the outcome is the same. Another common use for role mentoring is during a job induction or training period, as part of a training period. In this scenario, our mentee will have just taken on a new job role, and as well as learning about their new responsibilities on paper, they will speak to a role mentor who is in the same position/was in the same position. This is a more direct form of training, but it follows the same sort of structure as discussed above. I hope this blog has helped you to understand the differences between mentoring and role mentoring. Let me know in the comments below if you've experienced role mentoring before, or if this is something you hadn't thought about before but it's something you'd be interested in.
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19/10/2019 0 Comments 6 Red Flags In Mentoring Something that I've started to do recently is audit certain aspects of my life. I started with my career, then moved on to my finances, and then started to look at my relationships and friendships with other people. Luckily when I audited my relationship with my own mentor, I realised that we had a good thing going, but it made me wonder what the warning signs would be if things weren't going so well. I did a bit of research and read about some mentoring horror stories online, and came up with a few red flags for everyone to look out for. Cancelled meetings Whilst cancelled meetings can't always be helped, what I'm talking about here is repeated cancellations with no explanation, notice, or consideration. If a mentor or mentee is cancelling without care, you have to wonder if it's because of you or if it's because they simply aren't as invested in your relationship and journey as a mentee as much as you thought. That might be a hard truth to realise, but it's better you find out early before you invest too much of your time or effort. Remember not to assume the worst first though, because there might be a good reason for the cancellations that has nothing to do with you. Communication is key in these situations. Not listening If you find that you are repeating yourself a lot or that your mentee/mentor is asking you the same questions in each meeting, it might be that they haven't been paying attention to you. We are all human of course so a handful of these instances are to be expected. However, if this is a common occurrence then you might want to look at why. Later this month we will discuss how important and beneficial active listening is for both mentors and mentees, so it might be worth checking that out if this is one of your red flags. Unrealistic expectations Having clear aims and goals when starting a mentoring relationship is not only crucial to productivity and success, but it's also important when setting expectations for both mentees and mentors. Without setting these, there is a danger that one party simply won't deliver what the other party wants. This breeds disappointment and sometimes even resentment, which are absolutely not two feelings you want present when mentoring. 1 way street Are you making all the effort with regards to organising meetings, leading discussions, and making general contact? Sometimes this is a reality of peoples relationships, especially for the mentee, and it's also encouraged to a certain degree because a mentee should drive their relationship, so naturally they will be taking on more responsibility. I would advise you to keep a check on this though because if your mentor (or mentee) thinks they can coast the relationship and just simply turn up to meetings without making any additional effort, then something needs to be said. Soap box There is a danger, especially when a mentee and mentor both work for the same company, of meetings derailing and becoming an opportunity for gossip, a rant, or agenda pushing. The odd comment here and there about a shared grievance is fine, especially when building your relationship at the beginning, but try to remember why you are there and stay on track whenever possible. No spark This one isn't easy to talk about but it's an easy one to recognise. Even if none of the above apply to you, if you don't have an obvious connection with your mentor or mentee, then you have to wonder what the result of this will be. It might be that you can carry on with your relationship and meet your goals together, but one of the benefits of mentoring that is can be a very enjoyable experience, and one that you will want to recreate with others. If you have that connection and chemistry in your relationship, you can build something really special between you. Now I'm not necessarily suggesting that if any of these issues are present in your mentoring relationship, that you end it immediately, I would just advise you to be aware of them and attempt to fix them or move on from them if possible. Good communication can resolve the majority of the above so make sure that once you've identified a red flag, you talk it through with each other before making any rash decisions. Remember though, if an issue is left unchecked, then your relationship could meet a sticky end. Please let me know what you thought of this blog and if you have experienced any of these red flags or perhaps another that I have not discussed. I look forward to reading your comments below! To be the first to find out about next week's blog, make sure you sign up to our weekly newsletter, below. Something that I've started to do recently is audit certain aspects of my life. I started with my career, then moved on to my finances, and then started to look at my relationships and friendships with other people. Luckily when I audited my relationship with my own mentor, I realised that we had a good thing going, but it made me wonder what the warning signs would be if things weren't going so well. I did a bit of research and read about some mentoring horror stories online, and came up with a few red flags for everyone to look out for. Cancelled meetings Whilst cancelled meetings can't always be helped, what I'm talking about here is repeated cancellations with no explanation, notice, or consideration. If a mentor or mentee is cancelling without care, you have to wonder if it's because of you or if it's because they simply aren't as invested in your relationship and journey as a mentee as much as you thought. That might be a hard truth to realise, but it's better you find out early before you invest too much of your time or effort. Remember not to assume the worst first though, because there might be a good reason for the cancellations that has nothing to do with you. Communication is key in these situations. Not listening If you find that you are repeating yourself a lot or that your mentee/mentor is asking you the same questions in each meeting, it might be that they haven't been paying attention to you. We are all human of course so a handful of these instances are to be expected. However, if this is a common occurrence then you might want to look at why. Later this month we will discuss how important and beneficial active listening is for both mentors and mentees, so it might be worth checking that out if this is one of your red flags. Unrealistic expectations Having clear aims and goals when starting a mentoring relationship is not only crucial to productivity and success, but it's also important when setting expectations for both mentees and mentors. Without setting these, there is a danger that one party simply won't deliver what the other party wants. This breeds disappointment and sometimes even resentment, which are absolutely not two feelings you want present when mentoring. 1 way street Are you making all the effort with regards to organising meetings, leading discussions, and making general contact? Sometimes this is a reality of peoples relationships, especially for the mentee, and it's also encouraged to a certain degree because a mentee should drive their relationship, so naturally they will be taking on more responsibility. I would advise you to keep a check on this though because if your mentor (or mentee) thinks they can coast the relationship and just simply turn up to meetings without making any additional effort, then something needs to be said. Soap box There is a danger, especially when a mentee and mentor both work for the same company, of meetings derailing and becoming an opportunity for gossip, a rant, or agenda pushing. The odd comment here and there about a shared grievance is fine, especially when building your relationship at the beginning, but try to remember why you are there and stay on track whenever possible. No spark This one isn't easy to talk about but it's an easy one to recognise. Even if none of the above apply to you, if you don't have an obvious connection with your mentor or mentee, then you have to wonder what the result of this will be. It might be that you can carry on with your relationship and meet your goals together, but one of the benefits of mentoring that is can be a very enjoyable experience, and one that you will want to recreate with others. If you have that connection and chemistry in your relationship, you can build something really special between you. Now I'm not necessarily suggesting that if any of these issues are present in your mentoring relationship, that you end it immediately, I would just advise you to be aware of them and attempt to fix them or move on from them if possible. Good communication can resolve the majority of the above so make sure that once you've identified a red flag, you talk it through with each other before making any rash decisions. Remember though, if an issue is left unchecked, then your relationship could meet a sticky end. Please let me know what you thought of this blog and if you have experienced any of these red flags or perhaps another that I have not discussed. I look forward to reading your comments below! 19/10/2019 0 Comments October 19th, 2019 For many of my adult years, I went around thinking that I knew best. Not in a cocky, self assured way, but more of a 'this is my journey, if I ask for help then I've failed' kind of way. I speak in my story about how I went through several perceived failures in my career. That developed into a sinking feeling that perhaps I wasn't meant to succeed on the same level as I had once hoped for. Maybe I wasn't meant to do more? Surely if I was, I would be doing it by now?
I can't remember the exact moment that I thought about mentoring, but I do know that it was a hail mary for my career. I had developed my basic, entry level skills as much as possible, but I still had that feeling underneath that I wasn't done yet. I just needed a little help getting that feeling front and centre, so I accepted that I might need a mentor. It was the best decision that I made because my feelings of failure and my feelings of potential success were put into the correct perspectives with my mentor's help, and I developed the confidence and conviction to go after what I wanted. You might be in a similar position in your career. You might even be enjoying your position, or you might be a few steps above entry level, earning good money and making your mark in your industry. From my experience though, it doesn't matter where you are in your career. You need a mentor if there is a disconnect between a faint feeling you can do or be more, and the position you are currently in. Don't ignore that feeling, go after it. Another reason for seeking out a mentor, and the main reason that I hope to have a handful of other mentors in my life, is that of continuous growth and development. Knowing how beneficial my first mentoring relationship was to my career, makes me excited to see what good can come from future mentoring relationships. The world keeps moving and changing; you'd be a fool to stand still and not move and change with it. Self-development is high on my list of priorities, and a great way to achieve that is through mentoring. Honestly though, I think the best way to know if you need a mentor is if you've found this blog post online after searching the question 'do I need a mentor?', or something similar. If you're asking the question, then you already have your answer - yes! Your next step is finding your mentor, which we discussed in one of our launch day blogs last week. Did you find the answer to this question another way? Let me know in the comments below and lets start a discussion about that moment that you knew mentoring was your next move. Don't forget to subscribe to the weekly newsletter below to be the first to hear about enhance mentoring's future blogs. |
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